Sunrise Failure

I had this absolutely genius idea a couple of weeks ago. I decided that I was going to get up at 5am every day and start doing productive things with my life, like working out and writing. Getting up at 5am would give me a solid two hours of extra time on most mornings and I could do a lot with an extra two hours. Getting up at 5am was, clearly, a great idea and would change my life. Knowing myself fairly well I actually set the alarm for 4:45 to ensure that I would be out of bed at 5am. It was going to be great! This is what I expected:

cinderella morning


This is what reality ended up looking like:

mouse morning


At least that’s what reality looked like on the days I managed to reach a point of wakefulness that I could slick down my crazy-wild hair and be sitting upright (I think there were two of those days.) Most of the others I have slapped the snooze on my alarm or dragged myself to the couch where I fell asleep sitting up with a cup of coffee in my hand. There were also days that I just slept through the alarms entirely waking up with five minutes to get dressed and be at work. Joy!

So much for fitness and writing and productivity!

Why is it so hard for me to get out of bed early? I think about my parents who did it every day for decades and I never really saw them complain or nap. Other people do it. People with kids are up and getting themselves put together. I have no kids, a pretty flexible life, and a job close by my home. Why can’t I manage to drag myself out of bed? I can really only think of two things: crappy sleep habits and I love bed. And my crappy sleep habits are special crappy.

lucifer disapproves

I sleep with my phone which means I check it near constantly. I don’t have notifications disabled or sleep-mode on. I bring drinks (and sometimes snacks) to bed. I don’t have a bedtime ritual outside of washing my face. The room is sometimes too hot, sometimes too cold. My mattress is pretty terrible. Oh and there are the cats. I’ve managed to keep them out of my new bedroom, but they like to protest at the door. I also have no curtain on my window so the moonlight is pretty potent. I feel this is remedied by my pile of pillows, as in I can hide under the pillows to avoid the light. Oh and I tend to go to bed at around midnight, fully exhausted, and somehow expect for the alarm to go off and me be fully rested. That certainly hasn’t happened.

And yet I wish I could be more of a morning person. The discipline of getting up early and starting my day as opposed to running around and trying to catch up with a day train that has already left the station would be amazing. This week I’m going to try to make some small changes to help mornings work better. I mean, two extra hours is really hard to turn down.

But I did hit the snooze for two hours this morning so I guess we’ll see.


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